You Know You Are A Triathlete When …

The following appeared in Triathlete Magazine—and have more than a grain of truth:

  • Your bedtime is that of a preschooler
  • Compression garments have made their way into your business attire
  • You have no problem disrobing in public
  • You have no problem spitting and blowing your nose without a handkerchief
  • You are willing to tattoo a business logo onto your skin, permanently
  • You know the weight of each bolt on your bike but can’t find the oil-measuring stick thingy foryour car
  • You come back to work after vacation exhausted and needing more time off
  • Laundry day is when you run out of workout clothes
  • You plan your wedding for the winter to accommodate your race schedule and those of your guests
  • You smell permanently of chlorine and your hair is tinged ever-so-slightly green
  • You check youre e-mail/Twitter/Facebook account while wearing your cycling kit and a helmet
  • Your breakfast, lunch and dinner consist of Clif/Power/Name-your-brand bars, all consumed while moving at a fast speed
  • It only takes one beer and your quads go tingly
  • Spandex isn’t tight enough
  • Your bike on the roof rack doubles the price of your car
  • You can use the word “fartlek” in a sentence without giggling
  • You wear a wetsuit in the pool
  • You sleep with a heart rate monitor on
  • You have downloaded Powertap files while at a dinner party
  • You’re either swimming, biking or running in your Facebook profile picture
  • You have no idea when your friend’s birthday is, but you can list her run splits from the last three races

I said “yes” to 11/21. And for the record, I didn’t get an Ironman tattoo.


One response to “You Know You Are A Triathlete When …

  1. During my ride, I twittered a girlfriend of mine, who I know the split times of, that I needed a new tri suit because it was feeling loose. I have dreams of the tattoo. Last week I slept in my HRM after another girlfriend, who I know the split times of told me she had. My bike tripples the cost of my POS, I’m biking on FB, the people at 24 Hour fitness call me the tri guy because I am the only one who brings his wetsuit, my pillow and sheets smell like chlorine, and I am eatting a Clif bar now.
    Oh yeah, fartlek.
    And you made me laugh with this post.

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